As you can see from the last few posts I have been somewhat down the last few weeks.
I have always found that reading Beatitudes is able to pull me up when I am down. I prefer Luke’s version to that Matthew’s. So, here goes:
Luke 6:20-22
Looking at his disciples, he said:
“Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God.
Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied.
Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh.
Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man.
Always praise the Lord and seek His will in your lives. In both good times and especially in troubling times. Is it always easy to see when things that happen is God’s will or just stuff happening? Sometimes not, but who said being a practitioner of the Way would be easy.
RedLetterLiving 
And, of course, being “blessed” doesn’t necessarily mean we FEEL particularly blessed, and certainly doesn’t guarantee us happiness.
I don’t know what you’re struggling with, RJ, but know that you have brothers & sisters who care. I only hope some of them are local enough to you that you can get some of that caring “with skin on it.”
Peace!